How do people choose how to act? They are motivated to make decisions based off of their personal values. These values are the defining features of who we are, and more importantly, where we choose to focus our philanthropic activities.
For class, we were asked to reflect on our core values. Some core values I hold are family and community. Family means something different to everyone. Although I feel a sense of family with those to whom I am biologically related to, some do not have that connection with their blood relatives. Those that do not have a sense of family at home, usually find it in people that are close to them, like friends, teachers, or members of their community. Family and community are so much deeper than just common ancestry, and are defined by the way they care and support their other members.
These core values derive from my connection to my family, and the effect that they have had on me to overcome challenges. I wouldn’t be where I am today without them. I was born into a big family, with 3 siblings, and so many cousins that you couldn’t even count them on two hands. With a family of that size, you would assume that it was hard to give each of us the energy and attention we needed; but that was not the case. As my family grew, the more love I felt. Not only from my parents, but also from my siblings, cousins, aunts and uncles. Even when I turned into a misbehaving teen, they still showed me the utmost support. Even when I felt I was unlovable, they loved me; and that’s what family is all about. A specific example, that is still relevant to this day, was when I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of 14. At the time, I was confused about what the diagnosis meant for my future. Luckily, it wasn’t a journey I had to take alone. Instead of making me an outcast, my family helped me through it. They helped me schedule appointments, regulate my medication, and deal with my varying emotions. With their support, I went from an over emotional teen, to a functioning adult. I know that I would not have been able to make it through that transition without the support of my family. From this, I how critical a community of support is for overcoming obstacles and distress in life, and the ripple effects it has on one’s future.
I derive this value from the positive relationship I’ve had with my family, and the positive outlook on my future that relationship has instilled. It could be said that I believe that struggling families should be assisted so they can transition into better families. But what do I mean by “struggling” and “better”? Sometimes struggling in a family can be seen as obstacles. These may be emotional obstacles, financial obstacles, or physical obstacles. By “better”, I mean doing what it takes to bring a family closer together, so they can better care for each other. Having a good family makes life a lot easier, and everyone deserves to have an easier life. An easier life is one where you have someone to go to when you’re struggling, and having someone who takes care of you. I understand that not everyone values family as much as I do, but this is probably because they didn’t receive as much support from their family as I did in my time of need.
Having family as a core value has led me to participate in philanthropic organizations that work to promote families by helping rebuild a family’s home, promoting those that have found their sense of family in the LGBT community, and working one-on-one with families. In the future though, I hope to donate my time and money into the Catholic Charities of Broome County. Specifically, their Children’s Coordinated Service Initiative. This charity helps families struggling to raise their special needs children by sending them a Parent Partner. This is someone who is a direct relative of someone who has special needs, and they work one on one with the parent to form an action plan to meet the needs of the family (https://www.catholiccharitiesbc.org/programs/youth_services/family-support.html). This fits with my core value as it promotes the relationship of struggling families to transition them into better families. This charity helps bring families together, and that’s what I value.
Amelia Thorp
Amelia Thorp
I also believe that family is so important and I really enjoyed reading your post of what family means for you and how your family has been there for you. Since coming to college I feel like family has become even more valuable to me, and the time I do get to spend with my parents and the rest of my family is even more special. Have you found it hard to be away from your family, or do you think that with all the communication that is available to us these days allows an easy transition away from home?
ReplyDeleteI also really like the Children's Coordinated Service Initiative program that you are planning to donate money and volunteer time to. In high school I worked with the students with disabilities at our school. I volunteered at the summer program and I also played in a basketball league with them called Unified Basketball. There was a varying amount of family involvement in the students lives, and it was particularly hard seeing some students who ended up in foster homes because their parents couldn't care for them. It would've been very valuable to have a program like this one to help these families to create a plan of action. Family plays a huge role in the lives of all children and every child deserves to know they are loved. Does this program also provide financial support to families with children with disabilities that are in need of additional services?
I too enjoyed reading this blog post, as family is a value that I hold close as well. Personally, I appreciate your openness and willingness to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder. It brought up the discussion of how important it is to have your family’s support, and you touched on that well. Growing up, whenever I needed them, my family was always there to help with whatever it may have been. Knowing that you are not alone and that your family will be with you every step of the way is a very reassuring and comforting feeling. The love, compassion and support that one can receive from loved ones when they truly need it most is unmeasurable. I think you described these ideas well in your post, and I could really tell that you stood firmly with your beliefs.
ReplyDeleteLike Nicole, I too was interested in the Children’s Coordinated Service Initiative you mentioned. The idea of pairing children in need with a parent partner is a great idea that I think is very beneficial. Going through life, having a trusted presence to talk and share your thoughts with is extremely important for a child’s overall success and confidence. I consider myself extremely lucky to have the family situation that I do, where that was always readily available, and that is part of the reason why I have family as one of my top core values as well.
Amelia,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for this article. I have always valued family and community as well, as they are crucial to the development of someone who is well-rounded and can take the love that they have received and use it to help others in situations that do not receive this support. I find it difficult to imagine not having the support I had growing up. Being able to rely on my family if things got bad, and speak with my family when I needed to, was how I became who I am today. It's an awful thing to think that others were not as fortunate.
One of my core values has always been belonging. When someone doesn't have the same family situations we do, and they do not have people to support them, or even that they have people around them, but they don't know how to help them, they may feel as if they are by themselves. That it why it falls to the community to ensure that they know that someone is fighting for them, and truly cares about them. I also appreciate that you brought up the Children's Coordinated Services Initiative, and that you want to volunteer with them. I believe that there are a lot of local non-profits that are trying to aid the issue you described, but this specific non-profit is taking a more direct approach to the issue, by providing a parent partner to help parents with special needs children. This is a way to make a better, understanding family.
As Nicole presented yesterday, the Boys and Girls Club also ensures the children in the area have somewhere to go after school, when they know their parents might not be able to take care of them. The idea of ensuring that people in this community feel like they belong to the community is a core value of mine too.
First, I want to thank you Amelia for your openness about your experience with bipolar disorder. Before reading your pitch, I wouldn’t have generally considered family as a core value. However, after reading your pitch I see why it plays an important role within philanthropic work. Although, in your case family were those who were biologically related to you, I see that family can also refer to those who may not be. I as well interpret family as a group of people or an individual who help you during difficult or challenging times and who you can depend on. Many of these organizations that we evaluated strive to help a group of people, a certain population, or community. Helping and supporting those in who need assistance can create a connection or bond between people, in some cases we even see ourselves “attached” to these organizations. I think a question could be are we more inclined to help a certain population when see them as our own family? Is this necessarily a bad or good thing?
ReplyDeleteThis is a really nice commentary about the importance of family; and I like that you acknowledge that some people find a family with people who are not relatives, but rather in the form of friends and community, and that some people aren't fortunate enough to have close bonds with their traditional familial relatives.
ReplyDeleteWhat struck me most about this blog post is your point about family always being there for you, even when it's hard to be there for yourself. This was powerful because to me, it sounds like the unspoken theme is unconditional love. It's such a human thing to, say, feel insecure in social settings, or to feel bad about ourselves for struggling in school, or to not give ourselves enough credit for successes and for the attributes about ourselves that make us amazing. But when you're with a person or group of people that you consider family, the feeling of acceptance and love and support, no judgement, no strings attached, is striking. Your example about coming to terms with bipolar disorder, and the role your family played in helping you deal with and grow into it, is a really cool example of how family can both give you support in times of stress and uncertainty, and teach you valuable lessons on how to address your needs and grow into a more self-sufficient person.
Thank you for your blog post! It was nice to see family put as a core value that can shape your everyday approach to life and your approach to which charities you choose to support.
-Hannah Neusner
DeleteHi Amelia,
ReplyDeleteA significant part of what you mentioned about everyone deserving to have an easier life strongly resonated with me. I completely agree that the people who surrounding an individual as one grows up shapes one's outlook on life. Having a strong support system, especially within family, can instill hope and a sense of trust within humanity, while growing up without a support system can make life much more challenging than it already is. Coming from an accepting and understanding family as well, I am endlessly grateful to my parents and my younger brother for allowing me to develop a positive outlook on life and have the confidence to take risks daily, knowing I will have people to support me from behind regardless of whether I succeed or not.
Your heartwarming example of having unconditional support from your family after being diagnosed with bipolar disorder was a perfect example of how family can establish a sense of hope and positivity within one's life, even through the most difficult times. I can understand how much this support must have meant during that situation. It reminded me of my freshman year of high school where I was struggling with an intense workload from classes, disputes with friends, and overall was not in a good place mentally. When I thought there was nothing that could help my situation, talking with my parents brought me a sense of relief, security, and comfort that I didn't realize I needed until I started opening up. I cannot imagine how I would have been able to deal with the situation if it hadn't been my parents guiding me through it all. The idea that you established about family and community being much deeper than just ancestry, and rather it encompasses the concept about people deeply caring for each other is a viewpoint that I agree with strongly.
I found the fact that family shaped your decisions in philanthropy very interesting and refreshing. Although I had realized how family can help shape decisions made in daily life, seeing how holding family as a core value can influence the charities one chooses to support due to paralleling morals between the organization and the individual is a new idea I had not considered before.
Family can mean a lot of things to person, and it can hold sentiments of belonging, home, and security. However, I also believe a supportive family is capable of teaching an individual about many valuable morals, one of these morals being giving back and building connections with others in society. Therefore, family can be an essential connection for an individual to employ their philanthropic decisions, and can encourage one to be involved in charities and philanthropic organizations, as well as how to connect with those receiving in charities. Your post shows how family can not only help a person grow into a strong, motivated individual, but also how it can serve as a crucial asset as a core value which encourages people to involve them in philanthropic organizations and charities, and is a unique stance on the purpose of family and community.